Reader matter:

I was single for a long time! I am prepared to have a relationship once more, and exciting hookup I’m not getting more youthful! You will find met a perfect guy. We both currently widowed for more than six decades. We put my personal pictures out although not my personal memories.

Im concerned because they have their girlfriend’s picture-hanging on top of the hearth, and he requested us to accept that it won’t be eliminated. I know he appreciated the girl, and that I would never ask him to refute it.

I really don’t feel comfortable. I think i’ll feel just like i am the third person. I don’t know how-to feel about it. Could I acquire some information right here?

–Alondra H. (Montana)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

This is a fine concern and another that I get a large number. I want you to reframe your thought of this picture. The girl above the hearth just isn’t their live, breathing partner. This woman is symbolic of the loving attachment this guy is able to form.

The guy requires his commitments very really. This is an excellent thing! He may be worried about the thoughts of mature young ones exactly who might see the missing picture as his or her mom getting changed.

When I found myself a news reporter, i did so a profile on a resigned Air energy colonel who had produced the leap to online business owner. His wife managed all of our television crew at their home and when I inquired if she could give us an on-camera “soundbyte” about his house existence, she extremely gracefully dropped by detailing that they had been newlyweds and there was an other woman who had stood behind that man for 28 years before she passed away of breast cancer.  This made the colonel offer the girl a huge hug and insist that she appear with him on digital camera.

My personal advice for you: cannot look at his belated wife as a threat. See this lady as an ally. Removing an image don’t take away their thoughts, it might drive a wedge in a budding connection with a commitment-oriented guy.

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